Too True!

I OWE MY MOTHER!!

1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
" Because I said so, that's why."

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY.
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION.
"Just wait until we get home"

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING
"You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR.
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS.
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM.
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Happy Mothers Day!

This has been a glorious weekend for me.

Yesterday, we celebrated the 80th birthday of Shawn's grandmother. It was a fun time, even though I felt strangly out of place amongst the crowd. I just didn't know very many people. By the time we left, everyone knew me as the 'mom of the cute kid in the dirt pile.' (They have just finished building a house, and why there was a 5 foot mound of dirt in the front yard peeking out from under plastic beat me, w/ a nice ring of dirt around it). I didn't sweat it too much, other kids took Mikey's lead, and boy did they have a good time... I don't think an expensive toy would've been that exciting. Shawn's uncle married a sweet girl from the Phillipines, and it was the first time I got to meet her. She was so much fun! Plus, she encouraged me to try some authentic food :) Yummy!! Plus, her friend had fried bananna's-it was really good, and I don't even like banannas!

Today, we actually got to be in 'adult church'---first time in MANY months!! (I love my kiddos, but I need spiritually fed too) They asked for all mothers to come up if you had a child under 3 years old for a special recognition. We go up w/ like 2 other families and are instructed to introduce our child and give their age. My turn came around, so I said "This is Mikey, and he'll be 3 in August" w/o missing a beat in the quietness of the moment, Mikey patted me on the head and said, "This is MY mommy!!!" and then he gave me one of his BIG kisses. Too cute folks, I was a puddle of tears :) Nothing could beat that moment for me.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!